BY KIMBERLY JAHNS
Due to the fact that I have a paper and an essay due, I really started to double down on my consumption of reality television. I know everyone thinks reality television is a waste of time, but when I watch, my mind goes numb, and I can sit for hours pondering why Jessica is such a backstabbing witch.
It may be considered garbage television but, hey, some people eat junk food, some people sit and do nothing and some people enjoy losing a few IQ points. I choose to combine all three for my favorite activity.
There’s something about the fact that when I look at how my life is doing in comparison to reality TV stars, my life doesn’t look so bad. Sure she is three years younger than me and can afford her own $2.7 million dollar mansion while I am drowning in debt but, hey, I didn’t offend a nation when I posted a picture to Instagram.
I was watching Teen Mom 2, like a true American, when Dr. Drew explained to the audience that some research had been conducted and teen pregnancy has gone down, perhaps due to the fact that this show is on air. Having taken some Psychology courses, I realize the validity and reliability of this research is probably problematic, but if watching more TV is what it takes to help reduce the rate of teenage pregnancy in America, I must do my part. Based on some research I conducted in my own head, watching all this reality TV is helping me be a better person.
Have you ever looked at your life and wondered what it would be like as a reality TV show? I can tell you, my show would feature four hours of me eating pineapple from a can as I binge watch Netflix, one hour of me dancing around my room loudly singing One Direction songs and then three hours of me napping. My show would be canceled in a week.
Bravo, the TV network, now has a show about people watching TV shows. Where do I sign up? I have reactions that are film-worthy. Here I am sitting on my sofa, watching people sit on their sofas watching TV. I am watching someone watch TV. I feel like my ancestors would be disappointed in me. When they fought for my freedom, I don’t think this is the kind of freedom they envisioned.
I truly do enjoy watching reality TV for its nonsensical-ness. I also realize that maybe my life isn’t that big of a mess compared to some of these starlets on TV. I do have to remind myself that reality TV isn’t always reality, though. No one looks that good all the time, and the vast majority of America probably does not have a six pack. Still, it’s fun to watch.
So the question is, if you live a life but there is no camera around to capture it, do you actually live?